Ingredients for Change


As long as I can remember I walk with the question “how does change happen?”


Observing myself through frustratingly looping triggers (“again…?!”), and through quantum leaps of change (“Oh I just DID that…!”) I’ve found three essential ingredients that at least for me have allowed for change in my thoughts and behavior.


(Meaning: not acting out of fear or projections to my beloveds!)

CLARITY- “What is going on? What part in me is triggered? What do I think I need and don’t get?”

COMPASSION - “It’s ok, you're not failing, you’re not a lost case, even though you feel that you are not lovable this is not actually true”


COMMITMENT - “I know this pattern. I know that it hurts me and others when I act out or shut down and I am committed to do it differently. No matter what, I will figure this out.”

And slowly I watch my ‘inner children’, or the parts in me that get triggered, feel more safe. I watch myself taking a stand for love, both inside and out, and make new moves.

I watch myself speaking from a place of open vulnerability rather than acting angry and shut down.

I watch myself TRUST CONNECTION MORE THAN PROJECTION.


We all have inner little child parts that have learned to act or shut off when they perceive a loss of love or safety.

We’ve all developed patterns of projection and triggers.

They show us where we can grow up and heal.

What belief or behavior do you want to change?

Sending you love!